Does Life Change After Marriage?

Hell! YES! (I did not mean it changes to hell) I always ask back a rhetorical question. Is there any 'time' in your life which has not changed? 


Here, I consider marriage as living a life with a person under one roof . Some enter marriage with rose-colored glasses and some with yellow-colored glasses. Such colors prevent us appreciating the natural colors of married life. 


No phase of life is a bed of roses. I am not here to paint a beautiful picture. As I understand life, I would vouch for my childhood being the best part of life. But, come to think of it, there were problems, fights, issues which were BIG THEN. If those problems and fights looks small now, don't you think we are doing the mistake of using wrong scale of measurement? I have grown up, so have the problems. Simple. Isn't it funny to expect the problems to remain small as we grow-up into adults?

BH is an aquarian. Highly unpredictable by nature. So, I did not have any expectations from him before or after. But there were certain things which I had to make a mental note of, once I started actually living with him.




1. How many ever times you meet a person before marriage, you do not know the person fully. Because, when you meet your beloved for a few hours, we try make that 'happy-time'. I do not call that pretense. (natural behavior to avoid pre-tensions). After marriage, you get to see the real people. So, there will be many bitter-sweet occasions. 


2. There maybe many irritating habits (irritating to YOU) which you might not have not noticed, like snoring like a bear, wearing not-so-soiled clothes, drinking bed-coffee without brushing teeth etc. etc. You may feel that you cannot tolerate, but slowly mind starts accepting the person along with manufacturing defects.


3. No frequent telephone calls, sms-es, lesser kuchhie-mucchiee conversations DOES NOT mean that "you are taken for granted". It just means now your beloved has the privilege to be himself/herself. And that is a luxury! Accept him or her that way.


4. There WILL be fights and arguments. There has to be. Two different people, different ideas, different thoughts, different way of looking at things will end up having an argument sooner or later. But, as long as you do not get vindictive it is good. Arguing objectively will solve the current problem and deepen the understanding. Let the past ghosts remain in the haunted houses. 


5. If you think you-two will be "two-body-one-soul", I am sorry to disappoint you, it will not be so. It is a fancy idea to think so. But, later at some point in time you will realize you have lost yourself trying to believe this thought. Couple should complement one another. Differ yet prefer. Celebrate the differences.

Change is eternal. Such things make life unpredictable, exciting and challenging. Let us face it rather than cribbing about "How life changed after marriage :("