Thursday, August 4, 2011

A farmer's bride

In the billowing green paddy fields, my daughter was jumping with joy. I climbed up a coconut tree to pluck tender coconuts for her. She was eagerly waiting with her mother. When I got down, she pounced upon me. My wife was laughing. I saw her face, there was contentment and joy. Right then, it started raining. I took the sickle lying on the ground and carried my daughter on my shoulder held my wife’s beautiful hand…. 

This was my morning dream I was reminiscing as I walked through the dusty dirt road. The sky was displaying its fury post sunset.

‘I am a better than average looking guy. I have a B.Sc degree in agriculture. My mother has worked her fingers to bones to bring me up after my father’s death. Our land holdings are neither too great nor too meager. 
They are enough to lead a comfortable life. We may not have a lot of liquid cash flowing in all the time, but we grow our own food, we get milk products in the purest form. We own a beautiful ancestral home with all modern facilities. We lay emphasis on human values and we have a loving warm heart. What more does a girl need?’ A trundling bullock cart made me realize that I was lost in thoughts.

I walked past a leafless tamarind tree, the sky had turned grey. I reached home. My mother was busy heaping the cow dung. After freshening up, I stood next to her, cursing my fate. ‘She has to deal with all these chores in her old age. She doesn’t complain about her blurring vision or about her health which is on its last legs. She is not too old, but the decades of hard slog has taken a toll on her body’   I touched her head lovingly. She smiled.

‘Go and rest for a while. I will get coffee.’ she said.

I sat on a bench attached to the house. Staring at the unstained moon, the leaves from the Beech tree stirred a light breeze which was caressing my hair. Mother came out with coffee. Sat next to me and spoke;

Mother: Son, you work really hard.

Me: Learnt that from you mother.  

Mother: The marriage broker had come today.

Me: He said the same thing? Nowadays girls don’t want to make a life in villages…

Mother: (with a gloomy face) I had been to an orphanage today as well, to look for a bride.

Me: (My eyes lightened up because I felt girls in orphanages would not have  experienced relationships like us. They may value emotions of people like us.) And?

Mother: Girls there say that they want don’t want to live in villages. They want to get drenched in the colors of city life. They want to marry a software engineer. It seems some rich people from the city, who want house-wives, come to orphanages and pick them.

Me: (frustrated) I don’t understand these girls. They want to sit and eat what we grow here. At times, they even throw the food. We break our bones in growing it. All village girls want to go to city and all city girls want to go out of the country.

Mother: (identifying with my emotions) They don’t understand, though there is hardship, there is contentment. We know how much mortal effort goes behind every morsel. But don’t worry Son. It’s not that all girls are shallow. There will be someone who will love to live here with a man such as you.

Me: (resigning myself to hope) Hopefully.

This was a brief insight into a farmer life of an Indian village. 
Do let me know your opinions. 


  1. Agreed 110%.. Things are valued more than people in recent times. I must admit I am a kinda village loving girl. The cool breeze and fresh fragrances can never overtake busy streets at cities. My first Visit to your blog and i feel its worth reading:) good post

  2. @Anuna Welcome Aruna! Far away from the hustle and bustle of congested cities’ life, and polluted air & ambiance is really pleasant.
    Thanks for letting me know how you feel. Hope to see you more here.

  3. Very true.. Nice story, Sahana.. These days people feel shameful to stay in villages. In fact, many of my cousins who have heaps of lands have deserted them and come to Bangalore in search of jobs. Sad state of affairs!!!

  4. @Aravind M S True Aravind. Pseudo status in the society robs the values out of people. Thanks for sharing your views.

  5. /All village girls want to go to city and all city girls want to go out of the country./

    Not just girls... Even the boys... I never wanted to come to city 15 years back. Status today - I am in Bangalore for the past 13 years. Until few years back, I never wanted to go abroad. Status today - I am working very hard to go abroad.

    This line kind of pricked my conscience. But, I don't mind. Let the pseudo status in the society rob my values. I have no other go - to prove my points... to give a better education to my kid than what I got... to get what I actually deserve.

    This is like serving in army. Everyone salutes the ones in army but no one wants their kid to join it. The best we can do now is to bring the values of villages to our cities and take the world class facilities of our cities to our villages... What say? :)

  6. that's was a great insight...even the girls in the village thinks so?
    where i spent my childhood it was a small town...i would love to go away from the pollution and the crowd of Delhi, where I live now, and live in a village...

    great post...

  7. Great post.. loved it! Even I hail from a small town and would love to go back and settle there from this city of Chennai.. But then, once you move out, you build commitments that will make you stay in the city for an indefinite time!!

  8. Great..! the emotion was splendid.. I liked it very much!

  9. I feel, its a human tendency to experience things that he hasn't. Its natural for a village girl/boy to dream about city life and its also natural for a city girl/boy to explore the outer world, buy going abroad..

    But got to say, its a good post with truth hidden in it. Keep it coming.. :-)

  10. True picture. I am from a farmer family and have myselfworked in our fields and worked had to see al this wastage.. And no one giving a damn to our farmers is a shame I myself have written a few posts on the plight of us farmers...
    Strange the people who feed the nation are so poor...
    Great write up....

  11. Missing the Best for the Better! That is what most of us end up doing. Well-written post, spicy and sweet.

  12. a critique of the present day scenario beautifully presented in the form of a story.... that's creative n unique
    loved it :)

  13. Sahana, you've got it absolutely right there when you say - All village girls want to go to city and all city girls want to go out of the country.. Am pretty much a village lover but what to do - have a job in hand that I can't quit at the moment and other priorities kill my dreams.

  14. Beautifully Presented very Nice story line.

    But about the opinion depicted, if we are having healthy discussion here, Then I totally accept what Mr. Bharathiraj has commented in your Blog.

    I am from Village too I know the difficulty which goes in but I have my dreams I have my ambitions and with all these I have my Financial ends to meet, Whats wrong in dreaming big!

    Lets get back and see how we can value it how we can help people in there to go global. But apart from this I wouldn't blame a girl who has dream of seeing a different world.

  15. @BHARATHIRAJA Well. I do agree with you, when you say that you want to go out and explore.

    There is no reason why someone who is working in the fields of the country should be looked down upon.

    What will be the plight of people in the cities, if all the farmers one day decide to quit farming? We cannot even imagine that plight. Can we?

    Both scenarios have to be seen through different prisms. They are humans too. They have emotions. They want a family.

    I agree, you and I will not want our daughters to marry an uneducated farmer. But, the point here is, if everyone wants to come to city. Who will be in villages? Who will be the backbone of our country?

  16. @SUB Yes SUB. I have my cousins who earn nearly 40-50k per month in sericulture+farming. They are not getting brides. They are 30 years now. Age no bar, Caste no bar. Nothing works.

    Rosy picture of the villages do not attract girls nowadays. They know they will have to work hard. :)

    Thanks for commenting.

  17. @Anand Well Anand, I feel, if we really want, we can go. But, being in cities we have tasted the comfortable life.
    Life is not that easy in villages.

    Even if there is a part of us telling us to go back to villages, there is a major part which tells us not to.

    Nice to know your views.

  18. @KP Thank you KP! I am glad you liked it.

  19. @Praveen Bhat Tendency to find a comfortable life. But, what will be the plight of the country if everyone decides that they want a comfortable life?

    There has to be people, who grow food and make money right?

    Well, I understand your views. Thank you!

  20. @Praveen Bhat Tendency to find a comfortable life. But, what will be the plight of the country if everyone decides that they want a comfortable life?

    There has to be people, who grow food and make money right?

    Well, I understand your views. Thank you!

  21. @Bikramjit
    Wasting food?! I feel so sick. They just do not know what efforts go behind it. It is really a shameful and irresponsible act.
    The day they pay a fortune to eat, then they will understand.

    Bikramjit, I will come to your blog and read your posts.:)
    Thanks for letting your views on it.

  22. @rajuda Sad but true. :(
    Thank you Rajuda for expressing your views!

  23. Very true, Sahana! People want to flee their villages and come to cities in search of a nice life... Even if they have huge lands there and can be their own bosses, they don't mind being a driver or a security guard here in a city! And girls? Well, you are absolutely right that most of them do not want to stay in villages... But i have seen the other kinda cases too, where educated, graduate girls have married farmers and are living happily... but of course, for the guys to get such girls, i took ages!

    My dream is to leave city, though i am in this city from the beginning and go to a remote village and settle... I may not fit into agriculture, but i can do something good for sure!

  24. @Sujatha Sathya I have tried my best to take on the topic. Still, I feel I was not able to submerge in the character.I would rate myself below average on this post.

    Thank you Sujatha. Your comments really encourage me to write better!

  25. @ಅಶ್ವಿನಿ/ Ashwini :) Cannot help being in a software job,we hardly get time to breathe fresh air!

  26. @Ramya I am not saying that dreaming big is a problem. What I am saying is, there are people in the cities who are making a hand-to-mouth existence. Many girls prefer them over people who are well to do in the villages.

    Modernization should permeate into all sectors of society and the facilities should be equally distributed across the country.

    That is when we can see a solution to this problem.

    You can be rest assured that you will have a healthy discussion from my side. :)

  27. @Sum
    You brought out an excellent point Sum. That was exactly what I meant. :)

    I want to go back to villages and settle there. I know I will do something. :)

    Thank you for sharing your views!

  28. Sahana....itz wonderful....i agree with this post most..

    Even i am from a village and farmer family.... I wanted to do after my PUC.But unfortunately dur to some circumstances no one supported me to join that course and forced me to Join Engg...Really now i am bugged of this IT Industry,i want to leave asap...but financial crisis made me to stay here for still more breathing fresh air is dream at all...
    but now i am knowing the facts of organic farming and attending seminars on that nad all..and my mother is director for one 'organic farmers trust' near my native.. even though i work here i oftenly vist other farmers field to know about organic farming...
    in future one fine day i will become a proud farmer and i will help others to start with organic farming...i wish to stay in mu village and want to do something for my farmers...

    read this article

  29. And for girls they will be havinh dream to fly away and want to leave in colorfull life..itz all about their mentallity and their comfortness...but the fact is now a days village girls are dreaming liie anything regarding city life..

  30. So true Sahana! U've described the woes of a farmer very well!

  31. Sahana, you have gotten right into the bottom of the heart; it shows you have unimaginable imagination!

    About the reality, yes! It's sad. We are trying to grow higher and farther, without being concerned to equally strengthen our roots @village.

    Uniquely outstanding post. Keep up the great work :o)

  32. The only solution is to modernise our villages with good infrastructure and not spoiling the villageness of the place.This we have to take it sceptically looking at our administrators and politians who rule us.

  33. I don't think it would continue like this forever. Anything that is ignored too much for too long will have to be taken up on much more priority later. So, the end of this is going to be something like this - There won't be farmers... Food prices will shoot up... Agriculture will become the preferred profession then... All our children and grandchildren will want to be in Agri like in IT now... But, it would be much more advanced then unlike now... :)

  34. nice blog, i for an instant felt as if i was in some one else blog. Good concern too and what you wrote was true, farmers in tamilnadu dont want ther children to suffer and send them to chennai and they intern suffer there.

    Think in this way farmers are ill treated in this country for years. Can we blame the women for wanting a better life. With farmers committing suicides all over India, which women would want to be burden by such a life and be in village.

    I say its our fault for not caring for villages and they are suffering and this will come back to haunt us.

  35. Given the ashen picture of rural life imprinted on our minds, can we but help wanting for ourselves the rosy charm, comforts and the presumed security of an urban life?

    Could each one of us who wants to settle down in a life in the countryside, list out, if only to ourselves, why we would really want it? Without ourselves debunking the very reasons?

    Are we not amazed at how we all 'want to, but cannot' yet?

  36. That is such a thoughtful and beautiful story. Contentment is an attitude. However, the rush of living our lives has somehow belittled the meaning of relationships in exchange for material possessions. Your post conveys a very important message indeed. So nicely presented. Following your blog. You may like to follow mine.

  37. Lovely story. Sad state of today's times. It is difficult to blame any side.

  38. My first time here via indiblogger. I liked the way you have portrayed the feelings of the young village guy. Nice :-)

  39. Interesting insights into a farmer's mind Sahana :). Have any of your stories been published, your writing is so professional !

  40. Brilliant post!! Felt as if you lived the character before penning them down..

  41. Fab sahan!! <3 <3 Even if US is deep down with all the debt shit above, people wanna come here and slog.. Pity!! :-( There's this movie - Doorada beTTa.. It was probably made for the farmers (those days) who were eager to embrace city life. Instead of remaking Sholay/Don, film industry shud remake this movie (Doorada beTTa) with software engineer as the protagonist.. Sad state of affairs.. :'(

  42. Nice one . Can understand the feeling of the people .

  43. @ಗಿರೀಶ್.ಎಸ್ Girish, that is the effect of being on the supposedly darker side of globalization. Farmers don't want their children to face the same difficulty.

    I will surely be interested in your mothers work Girish. I have similar plans as you said. But, I am yet to see what will work :)

  44. @ಗಿರೀಶ್.ಎಸ್ Everyone wants a colorful life. We cannot convince them logically because we will have to talk on emotions. As we all know, emotions do not have logic. :(

  45. @Namrata Mahalingam Thank you Namratha! There are many more. I have just concentrated on one teeny-weeny topic.

  46. @Prashanth Thanks a lot Prashant for your comment. That is really encouraging.
    The growth is in one dimension. That has created imbalance in society. So are the problems. :(

  47. @Anonymous Thank you for the comment.
    But, the reality is that we cannot keep the cake and eat it too!

  48. @BHARATHIRAJA That will not happen so soon as you said. It will take time.. But yes.. Rule of nature, what goes down should come up also.
    In one form or another.

  49. @RamesH Thanks a lot Ramesh for an insightful comment.
    Yes, the development has not been consistent and uniform since ages.
    So, we cannot expect overall growth of society now.

    People will know the effects soon. I can just hope that it will not be too late.

  50. @Anonymous Yes, we all have that hypocrite attitude. Rightly pointed out. 'want to, but cannot'

    To aspire for comfort and less work is human.

    But, there is a section of the society which is getting affected.

  51. @Barkha Dhar Thank you for the comment and the following.

    There are somethings which are above material possessions. We all know. But, something stops us from implementing it!

  52. @Rachna Rightly said Rachna.
    It is like we understand the problem. But, I cannot think of a solution.

  53. @Vamsi Welcome to indiblogger vamsi. Thank you!

  54. @Aparna Hey Aparna! That was the sweetest comment. :)
    No.. I have not published any article. Amateur moi.

  55. @Sunil Padiyar Thank you Sunil. I tried my best at it. If you felt so, I am glad!

  56. @Swathi Vivek TRUE TRUE TRUE!

    Yenu madokke aagolla.. Doorato parvato ramyaha annolva haage..

    Being in a different country is a prestige Tweets. People can do anything for that.

  57. @Team G Square

    Happy that I could find some people who can understand the emotions. :)
    The motive behind the post is achieved.

  58. Creative and insightful piece Sahana..

    Dint understand how I missed reading ur post all these days..

    Loved ur post and apt images..that second pic is amazing :)


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